To See With Eyes Unclouded
by Anath Tsurugi
Summary: It isn't just Newt's love of creatures that sets him apart from other wizards. There's something hidden inside of him - something dark and powerful that's been there since he was small, and the young wizard doesn't understand why, but there are those who would covet that power. How will he ever learn who to trust? (Obscurial!Newt)


(A/N) Oh, look. Another fandom…when I already have so many other projects going. Dear, dear, dear. I don't know. I guess I just couldn't help myself. But really, who can when Newt Scamander looks at them with those helpless bambi eyes? So yes, this was inspired by a prompt on AO3. The idea is to explore how a pureblood Newt would become an obscurial without abuse from muggles. I say inspired because I don't follow each idea exactly, but we'll definitely hit many of the goal posts suggested in the original prompt before winding up in the same place and, hopefully, launching into something exciting and new, but…well…that judgment must be left entirely up to you lovely readers. So let's see what you think.

 **To See With Eyes Unclouded**

 _Chapter 1: Mea Culpa_

"Newt! Ne-ewt!" River Scamander called out into the forest, grinning to herself when she received no answer but a slight rustling of underbrush a little ways back down the trail.

"Newton Artemis Fido, you had best come out now. I'm not in the habit of repeating myself," she said. The words were stuffy and straight-laced, but there was a giggle in her voice that was echoed by her son, the merry sound carried up to her on the breeze.

"All right, Newton, if that's the way it's to be, I know a certain little troublemaker who won't be getting any pudding after dinner tonight."

Still the young mother received no response. Her baby really was determined this time. Normally she would've given chase, but the swell of her seven months' pregnant belly prevented that. She would have to pull out all the stops.

"Oh, my. I suppose this means you _don't_ want to go and see Star Runner. We'll just have to head back home then," she said in an exaggerated mournful tone, turning as if she meant to head back down the path toward the house.

That did it. The little mousey blur that was her youngest son came bolting out of the trees, nearly barreling her over as he came to cling to her skirts.

"No! Sorry, Mum!" the three-year-old near-blubbered. "No go back."

"It's all right," she said, barely managing to lean down to tousle his light brown hair. "But you need to stay close. I can't keep up with you right now, little bowtruckle."

Newt nodded, keeping a firm hold of her skirt as they continued their trek through the forest. Faced with the threat of returning home, he suddenly became grave and serious, acting almost like an escort.

"Now, Newt, tell me again what it is you're supposed to do when we reach the paddock?" River began to question him. Of course she wouldn't have brought him out here at all if she wasn't sure he'd be safe, but there was certainly no harm in making sure he understood.

"Jus' like Mum," the little boy said with a studious nod. "Do jus' like Mum."

"That's right. If you do anything other than what I tell you, it's straight back home. Do you understand?"

"Uh-huh," Newt said with another nod. "Unnersan," he finished in a completely serious tone, somewhat undermined by the fact that he couldn't fully handle the longer word.

"Good. We'll be coming to the clearing soon. I'm going to need you to wait at the trees. You're not to come closer until I tell you. Do you understand?" she asked again. When she looked down at him, he nodded. The look on his face was still solemn, but the eager smile was beginning to peek through once more.

"Wan' see Star Run."

"I know, I know. It's only a little further now," she said with a smile. At least she would only be dealing with Star Runner today. She just hadn't had the energy to deal with the whole herd these last few weeks. It was strange. She hadn't been tired like this since she'd been pregnant with Theseus. Back when she'd been expecting Newt, she'd been bursting with energy. She'd been out in the fields with the herd until just a week before his birth. This time around, she knew Lance was thinking of having her placed on bed rest for the last two months, having official orders from the midwife and everything. Merlin's beard, if Lance knew she'd brought Newt out here –

River was drawn from her musings by the sound of Newt's quiet gasp. He immediately began to tug on her skirt.

"Mum. Mum, lookit," he said, pointing ahead through the trees. Grateful that he knew better than to shout, River followed the direction he was pointing in, catching several glimpses of black and a flash of orange through the trees.

"Oh, good," the hippogriff breeder began quietly. "She's here already."

In another twenty feet or so, they'd reached the edge of the clearing and Star Runner had come into full view, her black coat gleaming in the dappled afternoon light and her orange eyes sharp and mischievous on them. She tossed her head from side to side several times before offering up a quiet caw of welcome.

Newt made a small noise of awe as he looked at the hippogriff, reaching a hand out toward it. River could see how much he wanted to move toward her, but was proud that he remained at her side, alternating between making grabbing motions at Star Runner and waving at her.

"Now, Newt, I'll need you to stay right here," she said firmly as she disentangled his fingers from her skirt. "You need to watch me and do exactly as I do when I tell you. Do you understand me?" she asked yet again, taking the several extra minutes it took to kneel in front of him and look him directly in the eyes.

"Uh-huh," her son said, nodding solemnly, though his eyes still shone with excitement.

"Good. Now watch closely," she instructed as she pulled herself to her feet, more waddling than walking toward Star Runner. Maintaining eye contact the entire time, she offered the hippogriff what would have been a sweeping bow under normal circumstances, but in her case was more of a clumsy attempt not to fall on her face.

Star Runner tilted her head curiously to the side as she stared at the witch, as if to ask, 'Why are _you_ bowing? _How_ many years have we known each other?' But ultimately she ruffled her feathers in a kind of shrug, returning River's gesture with a much more elegant bow of her own.

River grinned at her old friend as she regained her footing, sweeping back some of the long red hair that had slipped over her shoulder in the bow. Then she finished her approach and reached out a hand to stroke Star Runner's head, which the hippogriff returned with an insistent nuzzle. River chuckled quietly for a moment before turning to look back at Newt, who stood watching with wide eyes.

"All right, Newt. It's your turn. Take a few steps toward her, and look her in the eye the entire time. Don't look away."

Newt did as he was told, taking several cautious steps toward them while looking straight into Star Runner's orange eyes. When the little boy came to a stop, the hippogriff's feathers gave an uncertain twitch beneath her hand. River had to resist the urge to tighten her grip.

"Good. Now do just like I did. Bow to her, and don't look away," she reminded him.

River was actually amazed when her son, clumsy, uncoordinated toddler that he was, actually offered Star Runner a very graceful bow. The only thing that gave away his nervousness was the wideness of his eyes. The whole way down from the manor, they'd been glowing with excitement. Only now, when he was abased before a creature several times his own tiny size, did he actually appear small and meek.

Star Runner surveyed the tiny human before her for several tense moments, taking stock before glancing over at River, pointed gaze very much stating, ' _This_ is your hatchling, human? I'm not impressed. No. Not impressed at all.'

But just as quickly, the hippogriff returned Newt's wobbling gaze and offered what could almost be described as an amused bow. Now grinning from ear to ear, Newt stood up, glancing in his mother's direction. She nodded her approval.

"It's all right. You can come over now. Just don't move too quickly," she cautioned.

Newt nodded his understanding, continuing to smile as he slowly approached the hippogriff. When he finally reached them, Star Runner immediately lowered her head to sniff at him, no doubt catching a whiff of the treat River had planted on him earlier.

"Hello, Star Run," Newt greeted, holding his hands up for her to sniff. When she began to press impatiently at them with her beak, he reached down into his pocket and withdrew the handful of mouse entrails – the hippogriff equivalent of a sugar cube. Still grinning, he set the offering on the ground so Star Runner could peck over it at her leisure.

Letting out a pleased sort of whicker, Star Runner immediately snapped up the treat, clacking in pleasure as she raised her head to give River a teasing nudge, this statement something along the lines of, 'No, not impressed at all, but he'll do.'

River laughed as she slowly bent down to pick her son up. "All right, little bowtruckle, up we get," she said, struggling briefly to lift him all the way into her arms. Nearly buckling beneath the weight of both her little boy and her unborn child, she heaved Newt up onto Star Runner's back. For a moment, the hippogriff pranced excitedly in place, but River just as quickly fixed her with a pointed stare. Her boy was no different from a baby hippogriff. He was not ready for flight yet.

Shaking her great head back and forth, Star Runner gave a dissatisfied huff, but patiently began to walk around the clearing with River as Newt sat giddily astride her back.

River smiled joyfully as she looked up at her son, so happy to be sharing this moment with him. Neither her husband nor her firstborn had ever displayed any interest in these magnificent creatures she so adored. Lance loved her, of course, but he was merely tolerant of her passion, and Theseus had his own interests, but Newt…Newt had been enraptured from the very first.

"She's beautiful…isn't she," River said, her smile growing so wide it almost hurt. Newt nodded enthusiastically.

"Pretty," he said slowly.

River just continued to smile at her son, pressing the moment into her mind…little realizing how it would haunt her for the rest of her life.

She was never completely certain which event occurred first, but the next thing she knew, two wizards were apparating into the clearing and Star Runner was panicking.

"Oh, no-"

"What is she doing out here?"

"Mrs. Scamander-"

"How can-"

River took little meaning from the jumbled words of the two men, one unknown and the other the newest handler Lance had insisted on hiring. All she could care about just then was Star Runner rearing up on her hooves beside her and Newt crying out in fear as he tried to hold on.

"Star, no-" she started fearfully, trying to keep calm herself as she struggled to soothe the hippogriff.

"Merlin's beard, the young master!" the handler cried out. Before River could calm Star Runner or dissuade them, both men had drawn their wands, preparing to go after the hippogriff.

"No! _Please!_ " she begged, trying to move in front of Star Runner, but the winged creature was already in a full-blown panic, rearing higher and higher. In her next wild motion, Newt was thrown from her back and sent crashing against a tree, falling dazed at its base.

" _Newt!_ " River cried out, and right along with her, Star Runner made a horrific screeching noise. The panicking hippogriff made several wild moves back in order to avoid the jets of light from the two wizards' wands.

"I'll get the beast!" the strange wizard snarled.

"No, stop! _Stop!_ " River pleaded desperately. If they drove Star Runner any further back, she might hurt Newt, still lying helpless at the base of the tree.

Newt Scamander would never tell a soul about it, but for many years after, he would see this moment in his nightmares, never certain if he truly remembered it or if it was simply the result of so many different people talking about the accident. Whatever the case might have been, he was just a frightened, helpless little boy in that moment and his magic flared out to protect him in the only way it could.

A barrier was called into existence between Newt's fragile skull and Star Runner's punishing hooves. The hippogriff's hooves were sent glancing harmlessly to the side, but she'd been put off balance by the unexpected surface in the middle of trying to take to the air. So when the rest of her was put off balance by the unexpected jerking motion, her wings also went somewhere she hadn't intended.

In her efforts to try and protect her son and her friend, River had gotten closer to Star Runner than she ever would have normally when she was this badly spooked. When the hippogriff's wings went flapping wide, one of them caught River hard in her bulging belly. She was shoved clear of the talons and hooves, but the damage was already done.

Newt didn't remember seeing his mother fall or Star Runner take off. He didn't even really remember the other two men who'd been there. He just remembered seeing her hit, and then seeing her lying on the ground, clutching her belly as she stared up at the sky with a broken, horrified expression, whispering over and over again.

"No. No. No. No. No."

XxX

Newt was nearly forgotten in the mad race to get his mother back to the manor. He was shuffled into the care of his and Theseus' nanny, Madelyn, who was able to take care of any minor injuries until his father was able to get someone to take a proper look at the boy, but most of the focus went to his mother and trying to save the baby. Newt was kept out of the way.

"Newt?" Theseus called hesitantly as he stuck his head into their nursery, where Maddie was trying to keep him occupied and out of trouble.

"Tesy!" Newt cried out, completely unable to say his older brother's name. "Mum!"

Theseus shook his head as he closed the door behind him. "We can't see Mum right now. She…she's hurt. Healer's in with her now."

"Want. Mum!" the little boy insisted petulantly as he disentangled himself from Maddie's hold for the sixth time running. He was a little less petulant when his brother came to him and wrapped his arms around him.

"I know. But we have to wait. Have to be patient," Theseus tried to explain as he hugged him. "We can do that. Right?" he asked as he pulled back, looking down at his baby brother. Newt wouldn't look up at him, though. Theseus tried to lift his chin to get him to look him in the eye, but Newt resisted the effort, though he did nod in response to the question.

"M-Mum," he whispered brokenly as tears began to trickle down his freckled cheeks.

"It's all right," Theseus soothed, hugging him tight one more time. "It's gonna be all right. We'll find something to do until they tell us what's happening."

Newt agreed, reluctantly allowing his big brother to pull him into all sorts of little games. Theseus had barely managed to talk him into a game of quaffle toss when word finally came to Maddie from the very fellow who'd begun the incident in the first place.

"It's over," the handler at the nursery door reported to the young witch. "They couldn't prevent the miscarriage. She lost the child."

"Oh…oh, no," Maddie whispered in shock. "The poor mistress. What will they ever-"

"Tesy?" Newt whispered, finally looking up at his brother. "Wassit mean?"

Theseus' lower lip trembled as he looked between the two grownups and Newt. "I think…I think it means no baby sister."

Newt couldn't really grasp that loss. All he could understand was the look of horror he'd seen on Mum's face earlier. She was sad. He didn't want her to be sad. He wanted to see her _right now!_ Seizing the opportunity, he bolted away from his brother and slipped out between the two grownups.

"Newton! _Come back here!_ " Maddie shouted after him, but he just kept running, ducking down a corridor before she could jinx him.

He took the most roundabout route to his parents bedchamber that he knew to escape his pursuers. When he finally reached the right corridor, Madam Fenastra was just leaving the chamber. He thought she'd probably meant to shut the door, but had been too distracted by something to do it properly, as he saw the door fall ajar behind her as she drifted away down corridor. Once the healer was out of sight, Newt darted to the door. He was just about to slip inside when his father's voice poured through that small gap between the door and the jamb.

"River, _why?_ Why were you out there at all? I can't believe you'd put them both in danger like that," Lancelot Scamander said, voice both sad and angry.

"It shouldn't…have been dangerous at all," his mother answered haltingly, her voice choked with tears. "If Tantalus hadn't brought your appraiser out there-"

"And he'll be punished for it, but that _doesn't_ tell me why you were out there in the _first place!_ " his father snapped, tone verging more on sad than angry. When Newt peeked through the gap, he saw Mum lying on their bed, clutching a ragged, blood stained bundle to her chest. Dad was kneeling beside the bed, worrying the mussed sheets in trembling fingers.

"Newt," Mum whispered, stroking the bundle as tears poured down her face. "I'd promised Newt he could see Star Runner. I've been- tied up so much- these last few months. I've not…even- _seen_ the new little ones. And Newt…he wanted it- so badly."

"And _now_ look what's happened!" Dad snarled, burying his face in the bedding, though the hand he reached out to rest on Mum's knee was gentle. "Our baby girl…our Talia…maybe if that boy would just keep his head out of the forest and properly in the nursery like his brother-"

"Hush, Lance," Mum tried to scold, though the tears were pouring all the faster down her face. "It- it's _not_ …Newt's fault. Oh, my baby. My _baby!_ " she sobbed brokenly.

Newt didn't really hear the rest of what was said. As he watched his parents break down, a strange, painful feeling began to well up in his young heart. It was something he'd never felt before – something he didn't like.

Guilt.

Did _he_ do this? The tears in mum's eyes, the anger in Dad's shoulders…was this somehow _his_ fault? He didn't know _how_ he'd protected himself before, but…was he not _supposed_ to? He didn't _want_ Dad to be angry. He didn't _want_ to make Mum cry. What had he done?

"Didn'… _mean_ to," he whimpered quietly, tears gathering in his eyes once again as he backed away from the door. He kept moving until he bumped into someone.

"Newt, what are you doing here?" Theseus hissed as he caught him in his arms, insistently turning him to face him.

"Sorry," Newt sniffled, unable to look up.

"What?"

"I'm _SORRY!_ " Newt burst out, and the sudden scream so frightened his brother that Theseus let him go and the three-year-old bolted again.

"Newt, wait! _Stop!_ " Theseus shouted after him, but Newt didn't listen.

The elder Scamander tried to give chase, but Newt knew the way to the side door he and Mum always escaped out of. When Theseus reached the door, Newt was already disappearing into the woods.

" _NEWT!_ " Theseus cried out. He ran to the tree line, but his brother was long gone, and he just couldn't force himself to go into the woods. Newt loved the strange wildwood, but Theseus knew just how dangerous it could be. He was just too afraid.

Maybe if he _had_ gone after his brother, things might have been different, but should-haves and whatifs can never truly be known. Whatever the case, Newt Scamander went into the forest alone that night.

XxX

Newt ran until he couldn't run anymore. If he hadn't been so horribly torn up by guilt and near blinded by tears, he might have realized that he'd gotten himself completely lost, but that was far from his mind just then. Panting in exhaustion and sniffling with the tears dribbling down his face, he crawled beneath a copse of bushes and curled in on himself.

Even though he couldn't run any farther, he still had tears left to cry, so he let them fall while he tried to regain his breath. Maybe, if he just lay here long enough, he could just disappear altogether?

And as he lay curled up against the dirt and cradled under the leaves, for a time it seemed to him that he really _had_ disappeared – that the woods had seeped into him and gradually breathed away the ugly feelings of guilt and sadness. In his half-awake, fugue-like state, Newt hardly even noticed the darkness of the forest around him. He didn't really notice the darkness until he saw the glowing amber eyes peering at him from out of it.

The black figure almost seemed to melt out of the shadows, poured into a mold that resembled nothing so much as a large cat. As it crossed the swatch of moonlight that separated Newt's hiding place from the rest of the wood, he could just barely make out the spotted pattern that was near concealed by the black color of the creature's fur.

"Kitty?" Newt whispered, reaching his hand toward what he couldn't have possibly known to be a kneazle.

The kneazle surveyed the human child for several long moments. For a human, he was remarkably unafraid. When she'd caught his scent from far off in the trees, she'd been drawn to it straight away, enticed by the innocence in it. This boy's scent was like a drink of cool spring water, pure and untainted. Clean and precious as he was, though, this boy had come into her territory alone and in pain – in need of comfort. Could she really be blamed for leaning her head protectively over the child, licking his face clean of tears while she allowed him to stroke her fur. She didn't know what had brought this boy to harm, but she found that it didn't sit well with her. A resolve was welling up inside of her – a resolve to protect him from whatever might do him harm.

Newt couldn't have known any of this, of course. All he could understand was that a cat was giving him a bath and letting him pet her. He liked it. It made him feel better. When the kneazle had finally finished her work, she curled up to lie down beside him, shielding him from the cold night air. She knew she could easily lead him back to the other humans, but that didn't seem to be the solution just now. So she stayed by his side, letting him snuggle her close.

Newt felt a small smile creep onto his face as he curled up with his new friend. He didn't know much about her, but he knew that she'd been there for him when no one else had been.

"Tali," he whispered as he snuggled her all the closer, remembering the name he'd heard Dad speak earlier. He didn't understand why, but he felt safe with her. He wouldn't have minded if she'd been part of his family. She let him stroke her fur until he fell asleep like that, curled up safe against her, he little realizing he'd gained a guardian and she little knowing that she'd been given a human name.

XxX

A new name was added to the Scamander family records that night, even though this latest daughter had never really been born. Even from the depths of her catatonia, River had still insisted that her daughter be acknowledged.

Lancelot Julius Promethius Scamander – b. 1866

Doreen Ursa River Scamander (nee Hopkirk) – b. 1871

Theseus Arthur Rowland Scamander – b. 1892

Newton Artemis Fido Scamander – b. 1897

Talia Iphigenia Marie Scamander – 1900

XxX

(A/N) So…loved it? Hated it? Meh? Any interest in seeing how it plays out?


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